For those of us who some­times ask, “Why is this hap­pen­ing to me?”, or any of its alter­na­tives like “Why isn’t this hap­pen­ing to me” or “What the fuck!”, I offer the fol­low­ing per­spec­tive:

Everyone, includ­ing you, has a mis­sion in life, a role to play, a mark to make, a song to sing. You were born with it. You do not devel­op it; you dis­cov­er it. You do not ven­ture off to find it; you sit still until it finds you.

You may have been giv­en a map for your life by some­one or some­ones, but it is not yours. Most of what you thought you knew about your­self is lies, because that knowl­edge was voiced by oth­ers. They may have loved you or feared you, but either way it was for their ben­e­fit that you remain where you were placed. Culture has a life of its own, with its own dri­ve for self preser­va­tion. Your indi­vid­ual well being is not nec­es­sar­i­ly a part of its agen­da. However, cul­ture can change for the bet­ter when the beings who com­prise it wake up.

If you are not con­scious or aware of your mis­sion, it is in shad­ow. You are there­fore run­ning on auto­mat­ic, for bet­ter or worse. You may be liv­ing con­gru­ent­ly with your desires and val­ues, but chances are that you are being con­stant­ly influ­enced by old sto­ries and soci­etal pres­sures to behave in a man­ner which suits them, not you.

Your mis­ery is mea­sured by the degree of diver­gence from your true path. Your unhap­pi­ness is the sum of your choic­es to not be your true self.

To see with your vision, to use your voice, to move at your own pace, to locate your spot on the stage is lit­er­al­ly a death-​defying act. You must be will­ing to lose the life you have for the one you want. You must risk all of the props, cer­tifi­cates, acco­lades, and self-​praise that sup­port your ego, the cov­er sto­ry which has allowed you to hide in plain sight. In order for you to be born again as your gen­uine, joy­ous, and lov­ing being, all of that oth­er stuff must die.

You are not what you have done, just as you are not what was done to you. Your sto­ry may have at one time sus­tained you, but now it drags you down, keep­ing you from your place in this world.

Your nat­ur­al state is a shift­ing bal­ance of equa­nim­i­ty, delight, curios­i­ty, com­pas­sion, and grat­i­tude. Within you is a full accep­tance of your behav­iors and a full appre­ci­a­tion of both your gifts and your shad­ows.

Embrace them with an affir­ma­tion. Codify them with a state­ment of pur­pose. Verify them with account­abil­i­ty. Finally, cel­e­brate them by show­ing up as all of who you are, every day.

Satisfaction comes when your life fits you and not the oth­er way around.

In the words of Bernard Baruch:

Be who you are and say what you feel,  because those who mind don’t mat­ter,  and those who mat­ter don’t mind.

In anoth­er post I will give some exam­ples of a mis­sion state­ment, and mean­while try your own:

I   _​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​   [verb, i.e. co-​create, man­i­fest, invite, etc.] …

… (a world of, a life filled with,etc.)   _​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​   [ condition(s), value(s), attitude(s), or feeling(s), i.e. love, peace, abun­dance, joy, etc.] …

… (by, when I, as I, etc.)   _​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​   [verb(s), state(s) of being, i.e. am, bless, accept, show up, act with, etc.] …

 …   _​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​   [adjec­tive or adverb phrase express­ing a val­ue or prin­ci­ple, i.e. truth­ful, strong, lov­ing, etc.].

Rearranging the syn­tax may increase the pow­er of this sen­tence for you. Remember, it is the neon direc­tion sign which lights your way. Tweak it, pol­ish it, and by all means make it yours.